daraar....

Milke na mila kuch bhi.
Milan hokar bhi na huyi.
Pehle nazariye se haan phir,
Gunj ooti shak aise,
Jiska na koi tol he ya mol,
Tukra ke bhi khushi mili hothi,
Ab tho bas faasle rahe,
Registhan ki badalte dibbe ke tarah,
Waise hai yeh wajud ki dastaan.
Akir peharedhar chahiye rehne ke liye.
Armaan tho barkarar
hai inkar karne ke liye.
Dehleez ke chaurahe par kade,
Samjauta hi behatar hai
Sitam ki tanhai sehne ke liye.
Alvida kehna hai lekin
is wafaa ka koi Matlab nahi
Jab daraar hua hai dehleez mein,
Jo woh chahe woh nahi hai yeh,
Is samjaute ko apnakar bhi badte rahe daraare,
Bas chup rehkar yeh zehan kar liya,
Yehi zindagani hai

just dust...

The existential quirkiness of life,
is hard to figure out or answer.
Yet we meander through,
Like a pebble rippling in water,
The ups and downs like a valley,
When it rains the river rushes through,
Slowly eroding the hard rocky sides.
When its dry the river thinly wavers,
Tapering through the edges with wetness.
The wetness evaporates 
But the erosion remains,
Slowly clawed after every flood.
The bleak periods in between a reprieve,
Only to hide the uncertainty that's hidden.
See-saw of this tempering river,
hard to know by some,
While other tries to get a hold of it,
to make it neutral.
The erosion so deep leaves a mark,
That no eraser can change whats left behind.
The true state of edges eroded is dependent
On the temperament of the river.
It gives you a splashy thrill but mostly
It gives a grisly fright that makes you realize,
The only thing certain is that even this valley
One day would become just dust,
By becoming one with the river 
That decides its destiny and fate.

A reminder....

Seven months ago,
Something happened to be.
A destined encounter with the one,
Picked from a lot
Like finding the perfect uncut diamond,
With a bit of tinkering would like bright.
So was the search for Mr. Right.
Uninterested in the happening proceedings,
She wandered around without care,
Of whats destined to happen.
Everyday suitors were shown and gone.
Except for one who was the jackpot.
She was supposed to claim.
Little did she know,
That her life would go topsy-turvy.
Trying to cope with surprising twists,
To the story that did not have a plot.
Only to be plotted with situations,
That she didn't know to contend.
She went from the land of Gray,
Into the land of Chocolate
Covered with a white elevated elegance.
She only knew of the transition,
And then what transpired,
Just flew by swiftly,
With incidents of happiness, fear and awkwardness
Only to be left with a reminder
Seven months later,
As she sat in a small cafe,
Drinking black tea without sugar
Thinking of the days that flew by
Recollecting every moment,
Waiting for the day to come,
When she goes back,
To her Reverie of unknown surprises
and interesting encounters.

Dreams...

Dreams of many kinds.
Conjured deep within.
Some knowingly done
Other unconsciously stirred.
The wonderful collage that emerges,
The disconcerting voyage thats traveled.
The fearful visage thats encountered.
All the makings of thoughtful menagerie.
Buried within the psyche of conscience.
As the eyes dim into reverie,
So do we into uncharted territory.
Unpredictable stories that play out.
Unlikely people that walk in.
Whats going to hit you,
Is what going to get you.
Overpowered by imaginations,
The things you see so alarming
Yet somehow fades away,
But sometimes becomes etched
Like the writings on a stone wall.
Surprising you in ways not known.
The intricacy of the strokes seen,
Like the delicate plumes of a feather.
Everything seen has a meaning.
Living in this zone,
Is like the hourglass of eternity.
Never knowing it'll pass
But making you go deep inside.
Treading the paths oh so gently.
Only to know that every path,
Has a direction only to twist
and turn into a whole new way.
Something that changes inside.
or something that feels right.
Maybe what is realized,
Is instincts that power you.
also drives you.
Even when the calming darkness
slowly falls on the eyes
That see this world.

Artham...

Naalai yenbadhu kanavu.
Indru yenbadhu Nijam.
Netru yenbadhu Ninaivu.
Andru yenbadhu kaviyam.
Thanimai yenbadhu thuyaram.
Ilamai yenbadhu vegam.
Punnagai yenbadhu inbam.
Tholvi yenbadhu poratam,
Poratam yenbadhu ookam
Ookam yenbadhu jeyam.
Jeyam yenbadhu sugam.
Sugam yenbadhu vivegam.
Vivegam yenbadhu vazhakai
Vazhakai yenbadhu odam.
Andha Odam sellum payanam.
Naam Yaru yendra thodakam.

Alternate Reality......

Monday, March 20, 2006

I kept on dreaming
Going into deep slumber.
Closing my eyes and letting go.
Diving into my own reality.
Conjuring images of my whims.
Seeing things that never existed.
Creeping up behind me slowly.
A shadow touches me,
Sending a shiver through.
I turned around to see
A masked face with eyes
Piercing through me like a dagger.
Only it gave me chills of pleasure.
A glazed stare of rugged softness.
A moment of few seconds,
Slowly it went away.
Taking with it a part of me.
I start moving unknowingly.
To the path its leading me to.
One side burning red ashes,
On the other cooling blue embers.
I'm perched on a lofty path high.
With surroundings of huey darkness.
Every glance taken to see
Where did the face go?
Corner of my eye i see it
and again it vanishes.
Leading me into a
land of high cold mountains.
With glaciers melting away
and the wistful snow falling
Everything white and tranquil.
Brightness of a kind never seen before.
Stopping me to marvel this sight.
The cold welcomes me
With open arms
Making me feel warm again.
I look around to see
Where is that haunting spectre?
Suddenly the same touch again,
A white cloaked figure
with those haunting eyes.
Slowly removing the mask.
The revelation stunning
Making my toes curl
And everything going out of control.
Slowly it approaches me
Taking me into its arms.
Holding my locks,
Tilting me downwards,
To kiss me senseless
Sending me on a spiral
To the blissful hell
Of having my first kiss.
A wake up call so endearing
Making this fantasy so real.
But it was worth it all
If this how it felt,
What would've been
The real deal.
My secret love now exposed
Leaving me bare
at my realization
of who that was!
As ppl. say
Stranger things have happened.
But not like this.

Rained feelings...

Chiming bells in the steed.
Wavering winds beckoning.
Stepping outside the threshold.
Unkempt feeling setting in.
Drops of rain splashing gently.
Taking a pace into the open.
Getting wet like an ebbing tide.
Setting afoot smelling the earthy scent.
Wisps of petals falling by.
Carefully not trampling the floral design.
Trying to make way to your abode.
The coldness sweeps right through.
Feeling numb at one point,
The frozen heart starts to melt.
To wash away the feelings
Once that were precious.
The beauty outside
Not reflected inside,
Yearning if it were the opposite.
Calming down the aching love,
That just remains a memory.
Written in an epitaph on a stone.
Getting wet in the rain,
Knowing those words
Won't fade away.
Leaving behind memories galore,
Thinking we may meet again.
Small green blades growing
in the place of a life living.
Far might the place they go.
Close they become as you grow.
Simply put in words not enough.
The feeling remains
Even when this rain stops
Leaving the wavering wind
and Chiming bells to remind.
Of what might have been lost,
That is always found.

Surprises...

Interludes of many sorts
Becomes the prelude
of many things never thought.
Surprises seems to be
the awakening key in life.
What happens when such surprises happen?
Should they change things?
Should they just stay the same?
Many surprises come and go.
But the one that catches u off-guard
is the one that really matters.
Surprises are like an unpredictable
weather waiting to rain on us
with bliss or scorch us
like the sun with sadness.
They make your life thrilling or boring
depending on what it is!
Never would anyone guess that
surprises are things created by fate,
unknowingly orchestrated by us
due to its willful hand.
What are surprises really?
Something we imagine to be unexpected
or is it something
that is always known
to happen soon enough.
Whatever it may be surprises  
are those variable elements in life
that can never be changed.
As its only by chance
does anyone get surprised.

The Scent...

A cold July morning,
The sun playing hide and seek.
Keeping afoot on the drenched grass.
Feeling of droplets at the feet.
Sending tingles through out.
Wandering through the path
Trying to know the surroundings.
Teetering alone mumbling around,
Feet stop moving and
Eyes start browsing.
An invigorating aroma bewitching.
Engulfs around everywhere.
Rejoicing this fragrance,
That has me spellbound.
A little earthy, a little musky
A little flowery, a little ebony.
Hard to describe it.
Reveling in it
I try to follow.
The senses guiding through.
Landing in front of the hall,
The beholder right there.
Waking up from the trance
Trying to find the exit,
Only to crash into him,
The haunting scent now
Ever more strong.
Tingling the nose
Into a rhythmic dance.
Helplessly trying to break free,
Just to be hooked on even more.
To realize that he was looking.
Feeling like crashing and burning
Never seemed so good.
Lending a helping hand
To help me up,
He was my knight in shining armor.
Inquiring my well being,
Only to nod in affirmative,
Words doing a Houdini.
He leaves with a smile
Taking the fainting scent,
That haunts me to this day.
And keeping me curious
As to what its name is.
The search is on.
The shadow lingers...
Forever strong in my midst.

Aval dhan...

Thuli Thuliyai pesum varthaigal.
Parka Parka vekkam padum kangal...
Malligai vasamodu pogum nizhale
Manjal poosi sirikum kannam.
Kolusu pottu sellum kaalgal...
Jimiki pottu oli kekum kaadhugal
Valaiyal soodi selai odu inayum udai..
Ora kannil paarkum oru chella paarvai.
Unmaiyana manin vasam swasikum thendral..
Velladai pola irukkum ullam.
Agam porul ellam thandi irukkum aethartham...
Punnagaiodu odi vilayadam kavari maan ival
Aval dhan andha Nadodi Penn...
Tamizh Naatin Gramathu Devadhai......
En Kavidhaiku Porul kuduthaval!

lost and found...

What are you to me?
Is a question I ponder,
What am I to you?
Is an answer you wonder,
What are we doing here?
Is something stranger,
Yet we are in this together,
only the rules unclear.
The game is fun,
Not knowing the pun,
Intending to hide,
With a quite chide,
It is never easy,
to let go of the fancy,
This might be the end,
Of the search you adorned,
To be in a stasis,
of what this is?
Only to be lost and found,
In this game of hide and seek.

Sweet Delight....

Looking at it for the first time
Never really was drawn to it.
But as you go closer to approach it.
And let your hands glide towards it.
A sudden ringing goes off in your head.
It symbolizes the sudden change
in the degree of attractiveness you feel.
Wrapped majestically with a golden sheet.
inside the cover lies the accused.
who has stolen your senses for a second.
The crime committed a very blissful sin.
The punishment oh so magnificently dear.
Wondering how could such a tiny thing
Wreak such beautiful misery
That keeps you afloat for an instance
That seems like a long while.
Slowly unwrapping the cover,
You discover the most rich
colorful terra-cotta work
of a dessert masterpiece
that can be called the piece de resistance,
Of impeccable culinary achievement.
Discovered thousands of years ago.
And still reigns supreme with us
when it comes to being the comfort
we look for when sad or the delightful
delicacy that raises our spirits when happy.
There always lies the question
Is it an angel in devil' disguise or
Is it vice versa?
No matter what it is
Its the most passionate food ever tasted.
Has so many varieties and variations
But never loses it taste or the charm,
that keeps the taste buds 

On a sweet alarm for mere seconds.

As a saying goes

Chocolate is the universal love for all ages

and thats very affably true..!!!!!

amorously yours...

Looking around in every direction
Trying to seek out the game.
Calculating every move he made.
Getting the easy way to go.
One smile courtesy of Close-up.
Hair raising mess courtesy of Brylcreem.
Always seemed to do the trick.
Every target on spot like he intended.
Not a day went by when he wasn't alone.
One for each arm,
If given a chance one for each leg.
Charming his way to get what he wants,
Effortlessly making them breathless.
Paraded around by sighs
For those who didn't have a chance.
Life was easy come easy go.
Women found were easy catch,
With the incentive of easy discard.
The one cardinal rule he followed.
If one gets clingy, find the nearest exit.
Or always use Its me not you
The magic phrase that did the trick.
All that was there in plenty.
But somehow he felt empty.
Never even realizing it.
The one thing he never knew was,
Beautiful barbies were easy to find.
But Heartfelt beauties were
hard to come by.
As it goes every Romeo
Meets his Juliet one day.
Some turn out to be
The disheartening tragedies.
Some become hilarious comedies.
While some become illusive dramedies.
Which one he belongs to?
What are his remedies?
Who is his Juliet or
Who is this nemesis?
Nameless and faceless she remains.
Waiting for the anonymous curtains
To open the way into the play
Thats titled his
" Real life with love????"

Reality bites...

You knew what you got yourself into,
You knew what you would get in return.
What you never knew was who it would be!
For years you spewed venom,
On everything you fathom,
As horribly chauvinistic,
You never did give credit for the exceptions.
Oh well what a hobson's choice you have now,
The joke is on you my dear.
Nobody would believe their eyes now,
The taming of the shrew so it became,
Shakespeare came to bite you from beyond.
So marvel at this quandry you got yourself into.
The irony persists where the player gets played,
By the unexpected chance called fate.
So enjoy the game while it lasts,
As the taming continues on a hilarious dramedy callled life.

My first love...

He walked on the field two decades go.
Had me at a century when I was five years old.
Every time he smiled,
A spark twinkled in my eye.
Not knowing a word about what he did,
I became mesmerized with every stroke he made.
Like re-living the fairy-tales I used to read,
Watching him play like a warrior,
Was the closest I got to see knight in shining Armour.
A silence enraptured me every time he came on,
The background noise around me
became white mute noise.
The yelling of my parents over the volume of my TV,
was lost in my maze,
of being engrossed with this curly haired wonder.
Never was I fascinated with Disney princesses and prince.
He was my prince Charming to my Cinderella.
He was my Aladdin to my Jasmine,
and I'd wander whole new worlds with him 
On a magic carpet along with his cricket bat.
Such beautiful fantasies I got to envision,
Every princess and prince do have their fallout,
and even I did for almost 3 long years.
When it comes to your first love,
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.
Three years of not seeing him,
Made me realize what I missed out on...
He was in his lowest of lows,
Yet I didn't lose heart,
Because he was the resilient warrior,
Who could destroy any witch or demon.
Trying to block his path,
He eventually did and
Climbed back to the pedestal where he belonged.
Now more proclaimed him as The GOD than a warrior.
This GOD deserves the best and 
Finally his deputies seem to come through for him,
Get him what he has most coveted for two decades,
The mother of all Cups-the world cup.
Destiny awaits him and he will make it happen,
For a quiet guy he is a storm to reckon with
For me he was the first love I knew 
and the true eternal love I will always cherish.
Tendulkar you had me at a century,
You became my god at a double century.
And you will always forever be my first love...

A decade has gone by but somethings can't be forgotten. Everyone tells me to be practical about it and move on. The truth is i could never move on. Everyone has written me off so thats the way things should be.  I can't think of anything that has had so much impact in my life that its past has a strong confluence on me and no matter how much you try to forget, you cannot.

Emptiness...

I refuse to say what is needed,
I don't know whether to be quiet,
Or be heard in this emptiness.
Is it wrong to feel wanted and
Be like a veiled woman in a desert,
Reassurances are good only
If they held meaning.
What am I to say when the world,
Unto itself makes you feel parched.
Emotions stirred inside you pricks,
The seering pain is ecstasy..
But the feeling of pain remains,
Unwound and unbound in this vastness.

into the wilderness...

Into the wilderness,
They both walked
Into the yonder.
Without any expectations ahead.
Time and again obstacles arise,
They thought they would face it,
Little did they know that
Life is one fucked up mess.
The more you try to resolve this,
The more complicated it becomes.
Even thinking becomes a part of,
an incomphrensible  jigsaw puzzle.
One claims to be immuned to the other,
Yet the other is drawn to this one.
How does the other overcome immunity,
To be a part of the one...
Not a day goes by till this wait will fade,
The wilderness is filled with surprises...
One wonders what it has store for these two.

Mocked I stand...

 I used to laugh at them.
The ones that said it was true.
I used to crib at them,
The ones who forgot others.
I used to taunt them,
when they said it was impossible without it.
I used to criticize them,
saying all they ever did was waste time.
I used to hurt them,
by making them cringe for mentioning it to me.
I used to belittle them,
when they showed it in front of me.
Suffice to say sometimes it felt so true,
that I tried to change my mind.
Sometimes it was so fake,
that I knew I was right.
I kept having the same stance for eons,
Everyone would tell me I was a fool,
And I believed they were wrong.
What it was or is I don't know,
All I can say is when you have it too good
Its like seventh heaven.
All I can say when it becomes bad,
Its like groundhog day.
Confusion confounded have I become,
like a clown without the circus.
I stand corrected as I say,
Detractors you were right and
I was wrong..
Mocked  I stand 
In this menagerie called life.
I never will understand it fully,
All I know is I have to move on
Without any regrets.

Ek asha...

Usko ho na patha
Akir kya hai khatha,
Is dard-e-dil ka bepahna,
Aksar sathaye usse,
Kabhi rulaye mujhe.
Chupi hui hai zindagi
Is kashmkash rahon mein.
Manzil hai tho paas,
Lekin Safar Lamba,
Kareeb aa jao tho,
Lamha khone ka naam na letha,
Deedar ho jaye ahistha,
Usko khabar na ho kaisa.
Muskurakar hum sama jaaye,
Is gehri naqab ke damaan mein.
Ijazat hai tho vida lethe hai,
Is Tasaboor ke saaya se...
Baatein jaari rehengi,
lekin faisla tho le liya,
Bas Intezaar hai us pal ka,
jab sab kuch ek nazarana ho jaye...
uske ek labz se...huzoor!!

For her....

For her he was eye candy,
who'd just blow her off
Like a speckled dust in the wind.
For her he was unattainable,
who'd never look her way.
For her he was ignorant,
who'd never understand her.
For her he was a nice guy,
who'd give the obligatory smile
For her he was kind,
who'd just listen to her ramble.
For her he was considerate,
who'd give the benefit of the doubt.
For her he was sensitive,
who'd never hurt her.
For her he would be it,
if it was an alternate reality.
For her he was a rock,
who'd stand by her.
For her he was a hero,
who'd be always in her dreams.
What is going on here?
The game of hide and seek.
The game fate plays.
Two hearts yearning ,
But each hidden under a veil.
Both stand here and gaze,
Only the audience know
What is going on.
The silence between them
filled with so much meaning,
Where is cupid when you
Need him the most!!!

For him....

For him she was a story,
who'd make him a hero.
For him she was a muse.
who'd make him an artist.
For him she was music,
who'd make him a maestro.
For him she was mystery.
who'd make him an enigma.
For him she was a riddle,
who'd make him a sleuth.
For him she was a pillar.
who'd make him grounded.
For him she was an antique,
Who'd make him unique.
For him she was a gem.
Who'd make him rich.
For him she was light.
who'd make him bright.
For him she was opposite,
who'd make him stymied.
For him she was anything but,
What he thought
was his ideal her.
For him she embodied,
The crux of his being.
She held his heart.
The question begets,
What was he to her?

Tiding life....

Looking around everywhere,
Glimpses seen of the past.
Scenes seen of the present.
Dreams seen of the future.
A collage of times known,
Woven on the fabric of existence.
Some bright some dull.
Making an interesting fixture.
Transpiring thoughts inside.
Waking meanings outside.
Leaving an impression subtle,
like a droplet in the ocean.
Only for a tide of waves,
that seem to ebb and rise.
Like the ups and downs,
Of this mirage called life.